The Prophet Said

Is back. In fact he's sitting right next to me. Singing...

Nananananana, CO-NAN!

I think my ears are bleeding.

How did you find out the secret behind Santa Claus?
Submitted by Carinish.

I knew as soon as I could grasp the concept that an old fat man coming down my 40cm wide chimney to give me presents is quite like accepting candy from strangers and highly doubtful. Also, when I was five Lindsay hold me hostage in my own room and outright told me the secret of Santa... She ate him.

Fall for someone that was just a friend: Yea
Fall in love at all: Yea
Lose any friends: No
Make any new friends: No
Make any new enemies: No
Lose any enemies: I had none to begin with
Develop any new hobbies: Yes
Get older: Yea
Do anything you regret: Who doesn't
Go to any parties: Yea
Accomplish anything: Yes
Make money: No
Attend a wedding: No
Attend a funeral: No
Get into a fight: Yea
Go to a school dance: No
Get a bf/gf: Yea
Get dumped: No
Dumped someone: Yea
Travel overseas: No
Get a job: No
Start to hate a friend: No
Lose a friend: No
Drop out of school: No
Get Driver's License: No
Go to hospital: Yea
Confess your feelings for someone: Yes
Have someone confess their feelings for you: Yes
Have fun: A lot of the time

How do you take your tea or coffee?
Submitted by Vasquez.

With a moderate amount of milk, one sugar and of course tea.

Large amount of milk, two sugars and the coffee.

What are your resolutions for the next year? What do you want to do? What classes are you taking? Are you continuing your schooling? Will you get a job? How much will you study? Will you make an effort next year? Blah, blah, fucking blah. Hey, threesome of 'blah's

Resolutions

• Complete a novel-length story
• Pay more attention in class
• Study
• Make an effort in class
• Get a job
• Take my driver's test
• Study
• Become a better person
• Speak up
• Gain more confidence
• Have fun
• Visit friends
• Write a script
• Get fit
• Pay more attention to my health
• Do all assigned work
• Keep my room/desk clear of junk
• Get over any resentment I have towards my friends
• Live
• Get a boyfriend ;)

I go through all the trouble of searching for a recipe, I get attacked by my sister Lindsay because she wants to know what I'm going to cook. I go through all that trouble just to find out we have no potatoes, absolutely no potatoes. So, instead of laughing at me like she would have done, Lindsay got me back for not telling her.

I am tied to my computer chair until I announce what she has told me to type.
LINDSAY SKYES IS THE BEST OLDER SISTER THAT A GAY GUY COULD EVER HAVE! She's also currently single and enjoys a guy with a good sense of sarcastic humour.

The end!